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Quote of the day

The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.
-Muhammad Ali


Pure class

Another session in Tex's Big Screen DVD theatre tonight: revisited The Score. About as good as it gets. And it's the only decent performance Brando has given since he discovered milkshakes.


New Link

Been reading her for a while...never got around to linking her. So here she is - the magnificent Kathy Kinsley.



Quote of the day

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
-Bertrand Russell


Hugh Mackay can stuff up even a Sep.11 article

Australia's proclaimed intellectual giant Hugh Mackay's great contribution to the Sep.11 anniversary is his new Sydney Morning Herald column The fundamental things. A remarkable title, considering Mackay fails to make any point whatsoever in his murky, waffling prose. It's a stunningly bad effort, even by his standards.

Some 'choice' excerpts:

Oh, we try to minimise the sense of doom by our use of that cheeky diminutive, "9/11", but who are we trying to fool? Are we trying to convince ourselves that, hey, it's just another date, just another milestone, just another entry in history's bleak almanac?

Well no actually, you dummy. "9/11" is the american date-format shorthand for the whole horrid series of events. Mackay loves answering his own stupid rhetorical questions.

September 11's significance transcends its appalling death toll. It was a precisely targeted attack on one of the icons of American capitalism, and a stark reminder that sophisticated military machines can never protect us from the fanaticism of the terrorist.

Well, shit hey! Stunning depth of analysis. Someone forward this to the few highschool dropouts who didn't think exactly this by midnight, September 11, 2001.

Children needed to be counselled at school, frightened by the endless repetition of television pictures of the attack and its aftermath, and, in some cases, deeply traumatised by the idea that anyone's mum or dad could go off to work in a big city and never come home. The world began to mourn the loss of the victims, sharing in the grief of strangers who appeared on television, bedraggled and bewildered, desperate to share with anyone the precious recollections of their last contact with a spouse, a lover, a parent, a son or daughter, a brother or sister, a friend, a colleague.

....and the revelations keep rolling in. Why isn't this man writing for The New York Times?

We searched desperately for the psychological defences, the distractions, that might protect our minds from the awful possibility that acts of terror might be visited on us, too.

A beautiful, classic Mackayism: an emotive, yet vague and quite meaningless suggestion, bereft of examples or evidence, posing as intellectual insight.

The New York Times reported an upsurge in visits to New York art galleries in the days immediately following the attack. Was this because artists have always been better than wordsmiths at explaining us to ourselves, preserving our folk memory, and signposting our futures? Perhaps those New Yorkers were consulting the only oracle they could think of.

Jean Baudrillard couldn't write such florid piffle. Exactly how many of the millions of New Yorkers sought semiotic solace in art galleries then, Hugh? You wouldn't be drawing out more dodgy analysis from cretinous generalisations would you?

In Australia, the most significant response to the events of September 11 was the declaration, heard repeatedly, that we should embrace those we love, while we have them to embrace.

I must have missed this declaration. Who made it exactly? Surely Mackay isn't just - *gasp*! - making this stuff up as he goes, is he??

The inherent fragility of life is well known to us, but the news of any act of devastation - war, terrorist attack, plane crash, natural disaster - punctures our complacency and introduces a piquancy into the conduct of our daily affairs.

Hugh Mackay's mind wanders where few others dare: the long-forgotten bloody obvious.

The real tragedy is that we need such catalysts to rethink our priorities. But perhaps Wednesday's anniversary will remind us of a universal message: we need to live as if there's no tomorrow and, in particular, we need to recognise that love's work - nurturing our relationships, making our peace - is urgent work.

The scary thing is that this is probably the most specific and relevant point this supposedly great social researcher and intellectual has made in years.


The nasty side of Hanan Ashrawi

The charming, soft-spoken Palestinian spokeswoman aint quite as "hugs-n-cuddles" as she's made out to be.


Princess Di - bah, who cares....

Whaddaya know, a column from The Mirror I actually enjoyed. Wish I'd read something like this 5 years ago. Fortunately, Christopher HItchens did an excellent TV show saying pretty much the same things.

"De mortuis nil nisi bonum," they say. "Say nothing but good of the dead," but I disagree. The dead are precisely the ones you should speak ill of (because they cannot hear you, nor can they sue), and in Diana's case it has to be pointed out that her stay on this earth was virtually worthless.

St Diana (Our Lady of Liposuction) may still be revered by many ordinary people, but in truth she never had much time for anyone except the rich and famous when she was alive, unless the cameras were there to witness her occasional displays of compassion.

SHE lived a superficial life devoted to pleasure, even leaving her young children with staff for months so she could sashay off to Australia.

Hehehehehe. Read the rest of it.


Quote of the day

God put me on this Earth to accomplish certain things. Right now, I am so far behind, I will never die.
- Calvin, Calvin & Hobbes



How to be a good Anti-American

Brothers!!! in these oppressive times where american democracy, movies and evil consumer goods threaten to crush us all, or brainwash us into becoming consumerist sheep, it behoves us all to maintain our intellectual righteousness. So I've prepared this little guide to help you sharpen up your anti-american rage.

TIP #1: America as First Cause

A little sophistry can go a long way in blaming the USA for everything. Lots of vague, emotive mumbling about global capitalism, McDonalds, Nike and whatnot should get the juices pumping. It needn't have any relevance to the subject at hand, it merely useful as a device to set the scene: the Americans are out there conducting naughty, evil free trade. This creates victims, who (of course) must strike back!! You may then take great joy in whatever atrocity they conduct, but be sure to couch it in sober droning about the need for America to "understand" why people hate them so much. Hey, it works for Jose Bove. This gibbering nutcase brave soul who wrecked a McDonalds to protest against...uh...well, we'll ask him later.

TIP #2: The "Either/Or" method

A tried-and-true tactic is the fabulous "either/or" method: whenever trouble develops in the world, you can immediately begin squealing at the Americans for not doing anything about it, about being isolationists, selfish capitalist pigs and whatnot.

If the americans do act, you can howl outrage about warmongering, American cultural imperialism, oppression of the third world, and suchlike.

Somalia and Bosnia were wonderful examples of this. With the European Union and other governments too stupid, impotent or disinterested to solve either situation, the Americans were called in to do the dirty work. Naturally, they rightfully got the blame for every mistake that got made.

Never mind the fact that they were the only ones with the balls and the muscle to actually doing anything. As good anti-americans, we have the privilege of pontificating with all the arrogance of folks who have never had to stand up for anything and believe we'd all have been better off if the nice Soviets had been running things

TIP #3: The United Nations

This is your big stick of Legitimacy. This fine body is here to serve as a brake on those wild, stupid, warmongering Americans. It shall be held up as an enlightened, sober group of liberal intellectuals who serve freedom, human rights and the brotherhood of man.

UN doctrine and policy will almost always run contrary to that of the USA. As the UN are the enlightened, clever, level-headed ones. You can use this as your whacking stick.

Of course, some might protest that the UN is at best a useless, cowardly bureaucratic monolith and at worst a dangerous, obstructionist propaganda mouthpiece for every scumbag and tyrant on the planet, and that friendly mass-murderer Colonel Ghaddafi has been appointed head of their human rights body. But you can ignore them. This is the United Nations after all, and they are the good guys. They will look after the world and protect us against these rampaging american scum.

TIP #4: Maintain your intellectual/cultural superiority

Americans - as we all know - are stupid, warmongering rednecks, who lack the refinement, artistic sense and sophistication of Europeans and the like.

It pays not to think about this one too much though, or mention it in any specific way. Just keep it in mind to maintain your smug superiority.

Be careful not to think about how the Americans - as a whole - make better movies, TV and music than anyone else, and that the rest of the world thinks European movies are a great cure for insomnia and would rather watch American ones. If someone should mention such things, just try to change the subject or mutter something about american cultural hegemony, or the jews in Hollywood, or how American cinema chains keep refusing to promote such crowd pleasing film-epics as The Existential Ennui of Jacques the Goat-Herder.

Think not about how the Americans are the only country to land on the moon, about how they are the leaders in almost every scientific field, that everyone in third-world countries wants to move to the USA, while hardly anybody in the USA wants to move anywhere else.

Do not think about such things. Your cultural superiority is assured: you, of course, are an enlightened non-American, and they are mere buffoons.

TIP #5: Faking geopolitical relevance

There are ample opportunities to carp about Americans taking action on the world stage, even when you are (after great pain) forced to accept they are justified in doing so. The way to do this is to insist that the americans ask for and receive international approval and support for these actions, regardless of the complete lack of alternatives put forth by our non-american brethren.

Of course, some uncultured american swine may ask "why the fuck do we need you in the first place?". Merely respond with accusations that this is proof of their arrogance (under no circumstance should you attempt to answer their crude question)

TIP #6: The Middle East

A very useful weapon in the anti-American cause. The simple mention of Palestine, "occupied territories" and the intifada is enough to ensure a teary-eyed blubbery response from a huge collection of clueless dingbats worldwide.

Do not consider for a moment that Israel is the only democracy in the entire middle east, which is attempting to defend itself from an entire continent which would gladly slaughter them in seconds were
they able to do so.

Consider not for a moment that many more Palestinians have died at the hands of other arabs than at the hands of the Israelis.

Consider not for a moment that the problem with Palestine has more to do with a psychotic death-cult religion which seeks to exterminate Jews. Rather, sit back and pretend it's all about US-supported Zionism. The evilness of capitalism and Jews is a real grabber.

TIP #7: Don't look in the mirror

It's best of course to avoid any discussions about the geopolitical history of enlightened non-American nations.

Especially don't think about Europe as the home of Nazism, genocide, communism and appeasers of third-world tyrants. Don't think about the French as the country that blew up the Rainbow Warrior and attempted to kill its entire crew, or whose intellectuals supported Mao, Stalin and Pol Pot.

Don't think about Africa as the home of slavery, brutal tribal racism, colossal human rights abuses, massive corruption and generally neanderthal cultural beliefs. (If anyone mentions Africa, blame White People and change the subject).

Don't think about Asia as the place of military tyrants, mass slaughter and open racism.

Don't think about how the Muslim world has not managed to create a single free, democratic society, about how they have not managed to create the slightest trace of an intellectual culture outside of fundamentalist clerics, about how the entire history of the Islamic world essentially boils down to warfare and prehistoric barbarism.

Don't think about how every communist society became a brutal dictatorship of the party, where mass-murder, starvation, horrid standard-of-living and cultural backwardness were the norm. Our communist brothers stood for equality and humanity remember? They are better than those filthy yanquis with their money, liberty and whatnot.

TIP #8: Read heaps & leave your brain at the door

Collate the works of a few noted anti-USA geniuses, such as Noam Chomsky, Edward Said, John Pilger, Marc Herold and anybody who writes for The Guardian. You can then back up your arguments with really impressive sounding quotations. Make sure you have a good range of them though, lest some arrogant american lapdog make a note of Chomsky's support for the Khmer Rouge, Pilger's "selective" scholasticism and Herold's rather bad grasp of basic arithmetic.

TIP #9: The American example is always the worst

Overall, this is arguably the most important principle of anti-american behaviour: anything the americans do is *always* worse than anything anyone else does. One must not waste valuable time and energy criticising non-american countries, particularly if those countries are third-world toiletbowls run by genocidal tyrants. This might lead some gullible fools to believe that the USA isn't the worst place in the world.

Some examples;
- McDonalds selling bad hamburgers is worse than the Chinese murdering a million Tibetans
- The americans keeping "taliban Johnny" in prison is worse than Castro imprisoning his entire population and doing away with political opponents
- the worldwide popularity of american movies is worse than Hamas slaughtering Jewish civilians

You see? With these nine tips you'll find it much easier to maintain the correct perspective on things and keep your mind focused on the true, american-induced horrors of this world.



Quote of the day

A man who is willing to commit suicide has the initiative.
-Boris Spassky



Long distance barfing

I've been slow on the blogging updates, mainly because I've spent most of the last 24 hours barfing up a lung or two. Holy christ, last night was really 12 hours of my life I'd like to forget. Endless power-puking, skull-splitting headaches, sore back and muscle pains. Wonderful fun.


Don't miss the 2002 Snowy Mountains Ride

I missed this event last year, but I'm not gonna miss it this time. If you're considering going, please take time to read the safety message from the organisers: ie. stay on your damned side of the road and don't treat it as a race.



How come he gets all the freaks?

If they ever hand out awards for "The Blogger With The Weirdest Readership", James Russell at Hot Buttered Death is a shoo-in. Just check out his list of search strings that people have used to find his site. Dude, what kind of e-mails do you get?


Back Now

Took a few days off. Got a bit bored with the world of the web.

Had a nice, kinda lazy weekend. Rode to Goulburn on Saturday for lunch with my brother. First real opportunity to...um....tap out my new ZX-9R a bit. HeeHee. This is a seriously fast motorcycle.

Sunday was lazy. Picked up my new $240 wooden chess set. Very nice. Did go to dinner at the Southern Cross Club. I love clubs: kick-ass food and decently-priced beer in a nice atmosphere. Found a new brew I like very much: Tooheys New.


Thank You Everybody

Holy Crapholies!! Back in July I had over 1800 individual visits and around 16,000 hits. But for August I got 7,752 individual visits and almost 60,000 hits. Farkin hell!!!!

Thanks to everyone who reads my daily waffling. Thanks especially to everyone who links to it. It seems the person I have to thank most for this massive jump in traffic is the Immaculate Blogatrice herself - Sasha Castel. Bless you m'lady. I must also thank the furious Rottweiler for his support. I'd also like to thank everyone else who's linked to me. You know who you are, and my heartfelt thanks.

Send me fan/hate mail: tex **AT** whackingday **DOT** com



Fritz Pettyjohn of California writes

In the upcoming trade negotiations with the US, Australia should seek to
include a provision providing for mutual "sojourner" rights for citizens of
the two countries. The sojourner concept has been fleshed out in other
articles on the Anglosphere, and is, I believe, the best way to advance the
cause. This idea has a number of advantages:

1) It would be bilateral, not multilateral. As the psychiatrist in "What
About Bob?" says, "Baby steps, baby steps." If it proves successful, it can
be extended to other nations.

2) If Australia backs the US in the upcoming war with Iraq, there would be a
legitimate reason to single Australia out for special treatment. Americans
have a natural affinity for Australians to begin with, which would be
greatly reinforced.

3) American opponents (black racists, UNophiles, etc.) would be hamstrung,
since Congress can not amend such a trade agreement - only vote it up or

Perhaps you and your fellow Aussie bloggers can run this idea up the
flagpole, and see if anyone salutes.

Well, fellow Oz-bloggers? What say thou? Personally, I think it'd have sod-all chance, despite any supposedly warm-fuzzy feeling the yanquis have for is. If my memory serves me correctly, it aint happened after any other war where we've supported the USA, I doubt it'd happen now.


Search Strings

Search strings thru which people have discovered this site:

canberra times ellis refugee (heh. Accurate on so many levels)
dickmobile picture
essays on conspiracies

holly valance lesbian kiss (sorry dude, I'd post it if I had any)
labor day wearing white emily post (what the fuck?)
the tory network of businessmen
women fucking snakes (I get a lot of snake-sex strings, for some reason)
whacked cars (whacked cars?)


"We'll send Australians home in bags", says Iraq

Oooooh, these dudes are scary huh?

The level of Iraqi anger towards Australia reached a new level here yesterday, when Dr A.K. Al-Hashimi, an adviser and confidant to the regime of Saddam Hussein, warned of the hatred with which Iraqis would kill Australians or the troops of any other country that fell in with a United States attack.

No you won't dickhead. The americans pounded your sorry caveman-asses into a pulp last time. Now you're even weaker than you were then. What are you going to do to them, squeal about "the wrath of Allah"? They'll laugh in your face and ram a grenade up your ass, fucker.

"Any British or Australian fighters who come here will go home in a plastic bag or on a stretcher," he said.

"They don't understand the Muslim mentality; God help those soldiers when they face our anger."

They faced it last time, and you got your asses kicked. Muslim warriors are great at shooting civilians, killing babies and beating up women, but when you're faced with an american, aussie or israeli who can shoot back you wet your fucking pants and run screaming in the other direction.

News dude: enjoy your last days. You're gonna get squashed. Talk all you want about muslim anger, allah's wrath and all the rest of your islamic crap. It won't mean shit. They're gonna be shovelling what's left of your corpse into a ditch, and there is nothing you can do about it.


Bless you fellas.......

Second SAS contingent home

The second contingent of crack troops from the elite Special Air Services (SAS) regiment to serve in Afghanistan returned home to a warm welcome from family and dignitaries.

About 150 soldiers were welcomed at their Campbell Barracks headquarters in Perth by their families and officials, including Governor-General Peter Hollingworth and army chief Lieutenant General Peter Leahy.

The troops were away for five months. They have been replaced by a third deployment of SAS soldiers to Afghanistan.

Dr Hollingworth said the men had served with distinction during their hazardous deployment and had made the nation proud.

"It is difficult to explain in words what we feel on a day like this, our gratitude and our respect for what you've done," he told the soldiers.

"You've conducted yourselves with unfailing courage, with professionalism and dedication to your mates."

Lieutenant Colonel Rowan Tink, who commanded the troops, said the environmental conditions in Afghanistan had been extreme, with the first contingent landing in the middle of the northern winter and the second contingent having to endure summer temperatures of up to 50 degrees.

On many occasions they were forced to lug backpacks full of supplies as heavy as their own body weight.

"One particular group I recall trying to struggle their way up to (high) altitude and bleeding from the noses as they were trying to get there in a hurry," he said.

"We are probably the only force that's been able to exist out in those mountain ranges and in the area for weeks, some of it resupplied, but a large part they've had to carry on their backs."



Inheritance Tax

There's a discussion about a 100% Inhertiance Tax going on over at the Catallaxy boys' place. Let me just say, I'm on Mark Harrison's side the whole way.


Did I really need to know this?

Bruce Hill at WarNow! brings terrifying news: Germaine Greer is back in the country.


This is brilliant

Vodkapundit has compiled a list of some of his celebrity insults. Just superb.


Castroland sucks

Thanks to Sasha Castel for this link to a Cuba travel-diary.


The dossier against a dictator

The Times Online presents 21 good reasons to oust Saddam.

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