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Whacking Archive 28 December 2004 I just watched the DVD of The Human Stain, a movie starring Anthony Hopkins, Nicole Kidman and Ed Harris. One word comes to mind: pointless. The two halves of the story really have nothing to do with one another. This wouldn't have been a problem had either of them been any good. One of them was boring and the other simply ridiculous. I'm not going to say any more lest I reveal certain plot developments to anyone still interested in watching it. It's not so much bad as a complete waste of time, and you shouldn't waste yours on it. Ed
Harris does play a good creep though. Pity he only had about three scenes.
One of the dopes at aus.politics is blaming the Asian tsunami on global warming. No,
really.
27 December 2004 ...I wish I were religious. I might then have the solace of prayer as a method of helping those caught up in the growing horror of the Asian Tsunami. I'll be throwing a few bucks toward one the the appeals that are sure to spring up in the next day or so. I'm kinda short of cash for the next few months, but fifteen bucks might get some fuel, food or a blanket to somewhere it's needed. If you have the means, please do the same. This
sucks :(
And if any proof were needed... ...of what a bunch of slimy cunts the screeching left in this country really are, check out the "Your Say" section of the Sydney Morning Herald. Some folks have sent in their reactions to the Asian Tsunami. Rather than express their sorrow over the event, they've taken it as yet another reason to complain about John Howard and Dubya:
Nice. Oh,
and who'd like to bet that Joe Vialls
will blame the disaster on "Zionist Weather Warfare Devices"?
Confusing search string of the day
I don't know. What
kind of decorations do they have in France?
26 December 2004 I hope you had a very merry Christmas. I had a nice day. It wasn't boiling hot for once, Scored lots of quality booze, had a lot to eat. Favourite gift: A Simpsons Monopoly game. It's the first time I've played Monopoly in at least a decade, and the Simpsons angle makes it a hoot (what other game lets you own the Kwik-E-Mart and the Burns Mansion, and also makes you pay protection money to Fat Tony?) Oh, and I got a jumbo can of Milo. Yummmmmmmmm..... And I'm also rather pleased at the wide backlash against the PC-crusade to remove Christianity from Christmas. Next year, I hope to see much more baby Jesus iconography in public. Also pleasing, lefty miserablist Niall Cook is throwing a spazz:
(Yeah Niall, we all know how much businesses love customers who don't have any money to spend)
What
a sorry-arsed goose this man is.
Colt Python Elite .357 Magnum
A
lovely and expensive firearm. In Australia, I've seen them priced at $3265.00.
Assuming you can get a licence for one....
Still
having a lot of problems with my cunting phone line and ISP.
Big two-wheeled sports tackle is expensive to purchase, insure & maintain. Grab a ZX-10, and you won't have much change from $20,000 once on-road costs are paid, and that's before you shell out around two grand for insurance. A lot of money for a very uncomfortable, impractical machine. Thankfully there are inexpensive options for those who want a big, powerful, machine with decent sporting capabilities, with the bonus of day-to-day practicality and comfort. The first of these is the Suzuki Bandit 1200, at the absurdedly low price of $11,990.
It wasn't long ago the big Bandit was the first choice for wheelie-mad hoons. It's still got a whopper of an engine, even if the chassis is a tad heavy for full-on sport-riding. For the rest of us, the Bandit still has more than enough capability to be a blast on the open road. And the fairing gives long-distance comfort. There are few other options to get a big bike for so little money. If you buy one though, your first purchase should be an aftermarket replacement for the standard exhaust, which is hopelessly restrictive. A bolt-on muffler by itself can add 10hp, a full-system over 20. Kawasaki have their own budget big boy too: the ZRX-1200
I tested one of these the day I first rode my beloved z1000. It's a very different beast to my bike. Heavier and slower-steering, it's a real 70's-style musclebike, only with the benefits of modern suspension and engine technology. The engine is a stormer: certainly better than the z1000. Tons of power and torque right off idle. The chassis is very stable, and - like the Bandit - makes a superb machine for long, fast weekend rides. The headlight fairing gives good weather protection (and helps towards the bike's great fuel economy), it's comfy and there's good passenger accommodations. Also - thanks to the twin rear shocks replacing the normal underseat monoshock, there's tons of space under the seat too. Cost
is $12,990. If it were my money, I'd definitely grab the ZRX ahead of
the Bandit. I love the 70's retro-styling, that great engine and the fuel
economy.
22 December 2004 Another one for the "maybe" list If there's one bike I regret never riding, it is Kawasaki's ZX7R.
While Honda finally ditched their RC45 in favour of a twin, and Suzuki kept releasing ever more high-tech variants of the GSXR-750, Kawasaki soldiered on alone in the 750cc, four-cylinder production superbike class.
Like I said, the stats don't point to a great bike. Those who got to ride it thought otherwise. Most positive reviews focused on the bike's biggest strength: its phenomenal stability. With apparently the best front end in the history of production sportsbikes, the bike could absolutely be caned over the crappiest of roads, while the well-sorted suspension, geometry and weight kept the front tyre completely planted. In other words, it was the perfect bike for Australia's back roads.
It sounded phenomenal too. The wonderful roar of the carburetted Kawasaki ram-air engine made the hairs on your neck stand up. It wasn't too comfortable apparently, though that is hardly unusual for a superbike. It did have some practical features for road use: the wide, flat pillion seat and strong grab rails provided decent accomodation for the 'better half'. They also provided a great base for strapping luggage to the bike. I'd love to have a weekend blast on one of these. The Alpine Way or Cann Valley Highway/Imlay road would be perfect. Pity they don't make them anymore. The bike is too good to be mothballed. So what if it can no longer fit into the superbike class? Kawasaki could just re-name it and market it as a brilliant sports roadbike. It'd be cheap too, as they long ago recovered the development costs for this machine. I'll
keep my eye out next year for a used ZX7R in good condition at a decent
price. Wish me luck.
Cuba and Venezuela to crush the USA So sayeth Crazy Joe. I'd like to take a wander inside Joe's head for 10 minutes,as I'm curious to see how his brain handles the difference between his Jew-hating bizzaroworld fantasies and what must be the constantly disappointing intrusions of the real world.
This statement has gotta be one of the all-time Joe Vialls classics:
Bwehehe. Yes, there's some frightening Fidel Revenge afoot. How? read on...
You heard it here first: America will collapse in six months. And we all know how accurate Joe's predictions are. Remember how Putin was going to nuke Israel and the Republican guard was going to drive the USA out of Iraq?
But Joe is convinced he's right this time, because all that intelligence he receives has told his about a new army of space-age Russian M-29 Death Jets which will vaporise the USA in no time.
Yes. The USA is about to be destroyed by Cuba and Venezuela. Hey, stop laughing damn you, this is serious! The amazing thing is that Joe actually believes this stuff. If you haven't been following Joe's works recently, Mr. Vialls has a serious hard-on for Vladimir Putin, who Joe believes is going to deliver us all from Zionists and the USA. He apparently has all these new space-age weapons which will deal humiliating blows to Israel and America, and the Russian army will conquer Israel and control the world. No really. I asked Joe via e-mail exactly how the Russians were going to achieve this if they haven't been able to control Chechnya so far. Mr Vialls did not take kindly to this question and started to talk about brainwashing. Poor
Joe. All the king's horses and all the king's men aint gonna put his brain
together again......
21 December 2004
-
Samantha Jones, Sex & The City
George "I hate the modern world" Moonbat is recycling urban legends:
The
supposed Pentagon report was debunked
ten months ago.
Canberra ABC news presenter Virginia Haussegger is a babe. Pity
all the online pics of her are terrible, which is why I won't post any.....
Favourite TV characters, part IV
Character:
Claire Kincaid Actually, the Kincaid character had a woeful start, spending the first of her three seasons as a tedious, incompetent waif. Fortunately, the writers gave her some personality in her later seasons. She never had anywhere near the aura of street-smarts as Carey Lowell's character, but the wink-wink scenes between her and Sam Waterson had genuine warmth and charm, which nicely offset the grimy legal matters the show dealt with. Of course, it didn't hurt that Hennessy was an absolute honeymuffin:
Sadly,
Hennessy quit the show to become a really annoying actress in Crossing
Jordan. Oh well.
Old movies that don't suck, part 2 A while back, I reviewed Roman Holiday. A film which - to my considerable surprise, I enjoyed enormously. I've mentioned a few times I'm not a fan of old movies. Crap acting, crap dialogue, godawful music and shoddy production design are not things I find inspiring. I recently had a chance to view another old hollywood classic I've never had the slightest interest in: Casablanca. And colour me surprised: I enjoyed this one too.
Why did I like it? For starters, a funny and clever screenplay that today's hipster screenwriters would be proud to have written. The acting was mostly top-notch. I've never had much use for Humphrey Bogart (or any other of the old Hollywood legends for that matter), but he was perfect for this role. Ingrid Bergman is the kind of luminous babe they just don't make anymore. And Peter Lorre's small cameo as a petty thief was hilarious. The real scene-stealer though, was Claude Rains as the wry French chief of police. He gets some of the best lines in movie history. The story works too: clever and concise, the weaving together of the romantic triangle of the main characters set against the backdrop of the WWII refugee crisis and a cat-n-mouse game over some missing documents was accomplished with effortless grace. It wasn't all good though: the music is as hideous as 40's movie scores generally are (did this shit actually sound good to people back then?), and some of the romantic dialogue was pure old-movie cheese. Still, we're left with a beautiful-looking, well-acted movie with a strong narrative that has stood the test of time remarkably well.
And guys, show it to your girlfriends: you will get SO laid.
One that really, really sucked If you've got a hated old relative whom you'd like to push into an early death, plunk them down in front of a large TV and loud stereo, and make them sit through Alan Parker's movie adaption of Evita.
I'll start by mentioning the good points: the lavish production and costume design, Darius Khondji's marvelous cinematography, and Antonio Banderas' performance - aside from his great screen presence, he also has the only good song in the entire film. It was nice to see Jimmy Nail in a cameo as a tango singer. And, erm.... the fact that I survived it must mean something. The bad points? Ugggh...where to start.... - Madonna: not to put too fine a point on it, she can't act for shit. Even in a movie with basically no dialogue, she made my flesh crawl. - The story: Why should I care about some fascist whore who fucked a dictator and died? I was half-hoping someone would shoot the bitch and get it over with. - The music: The "don't cry for me Argentina" tune is a good one, which is probably why it's recycled for Antonio's opening song, and on and on ad nauseam throughout the movie. The rest of it is some of the most dissonant, atonal crap I've had the misfortune to sit through. And it's sooo borrrringg. The soundtrack to this movie could be used as punishment in Turkish prisons. - The running time: Evita is over two bloody hours long. It just went on and on and fucking on. Given
a choice between a prostate exam, and sitting through Evita again,
I'll take the rubber glove and KY jelly every time.
19 December 2004 I've been farting around with firewalls, spyware and updating my anti-virus software this week, which in addition to some ISP hassles has kept me away from blogging. No
doubt you are thrilled at my return.
1: Why don't most advocates of public transport actually use it themselves? 2: Why do most people who criticise Prez Bush for his supposed "low IQ" believe everything Michael Moore says? 3: Why do most people who support the Iraqi "resistance" blame the Americans for not stopping the violence caused by the resistance? 4: If Israel really is a "Nazi state", why aren't all the Arabs dead yet? The IDF could wipe out the entire muslim population of the middle east in weeks if they wanted to. 5: Why do most lefties have such contempt for the electorate?
6: If John Pilger is right, and the mainstream media is "too scared"
to hear what he has to say, why does the whinging loser keep
getting interviewed?
I was delighted to see this in my inbox this morning:
Joe says this as a man currently living off the public tit himself. He's apparently a "disabled former combat veteran". If that's true, I'd like to buy a beer for whoever shot him. Besides Joe, I worked in a non-government owned cafe for seven years. Is that not a 'real job'? I've also travelled to six other countries. How about you? Joe didn't answer my questions as to when some of his brilliant predictions would actually come true, or what evidence he had for some of his more "interesting" theories. These have included: -
The Sari Club bombing in bali was a "mini nuke" planted by the
Israelis. I'm
waiting for your answers Joe. You know where to find me.
Today I visited a brand new scooter dealership: 'Moto One' in Mitchell. A charming little husband-n-wife effort, Moto One had a good range of Peugot and Bug scooters on display, and the couple were very friendly and chatty. I hope they succeed. Motorini certainly seem to be doing well. There's room in Canberra for two specialist scooter dealers. Bugs are manufactured in Taiwan, seem well-built and are incredibly cheap compared to the Italian and Japanese competition. This little gem, the Bug Espresso, is a 150cc four-stroke available at less than $4800 on-the-road and comes with a free topbox. The equivalent Vespa is around $6500. The dealer let me have a brief ride of his wife's Espresso around the car park. It's light, very comfy, has easy-to-use controls. Sasn't really enough of a ride to evaluate the engine or brakes, but they seemed ok in the limited test I gave them. This scoot will be going on my shortlist of cheap runabouts to grab next year. They also had one of these tasty little 2-stroke sport-scooters: the Peugeot Speedfight
Only 100cc, but a 'stroker has more oopmh than a 4-stroke, and it has some trick chassis parts. Yes, I know it's French. Shaddup already. The scoot I'd love most of all is the Italjet Dragster, which ceased production after the EU brought in tougher emission requirements.
This pocket rocket featured proper sports suspension and a lively 180cc 2-stroke engine. The Dragster is pretty much regarded as one of the most fun two-wheelers ever built. Even the power-nutters at Performance Bikes magazine featured this little scoot in their y2k "bike of the year" video. It wasn't one of the contenders, but there was lot of footage of them doing wheelies on the thing. There's a bunch of them available on the 2nd-hand market. I may shop around for one next year. Or if I'm very lucky, I may find an Italjet Formula 125....
I saw one of these in traffic today. Tasty piece of kit. Like the Dragster, the Formula 125 is a full-on 2-stroke sports scooter. The 125 however is the only twin-cylinder 2-stroker of recent years. The best part about sports scooters is the fun you can have customising them. There are tons of performance kits available. Race exhausts, suspension kits, even - believe it or not - nitrus oxide boosters. Scooters
rock. I really will have to get myself one......
13 December 2004 The art of living up your own arse Welcome to the world of Peter Greenaway, a man so pretentious he makes Jacques Derrida look like Russell Coight.
Give the man credit, his films are visually beautiful (watching Prospero's Books with the sound off is a feast for lovers of cinematography and production design). They are also pointless, stupid and mind-bogglingly boring. I dare any sane adult to sit through The Pillow Book without the aid of hard alcohol: An Asian woman likes her lovers to write calligraphy on her body. There's apparently some really important point being made about identity and textuality. And there's lots of fancy overlapping film frames and on-screen cursive text. I was so stimulated I switched over to the Home Shopping channel. Worse than the man's films though, is the experience of watching him talk about himself, an activity he uses to inform the ignorant savages out there just how clever and innovative his films are, and how he is taking cinema beyond the boring, mundane stuff like telling stories and entertaining people.
Oooh, I'm getting a mental stiffy here. Still, the literate posturing of Greenaway and his ilk can't hide the fact that no amount of new technologies will make up for a movie that is little more than fraud-art. Scorcese is just "re-making Griffith movies"? Scorcese has more talent in his faecal matter than this self-absorbed windbag will have in his entire miserable career. Greenaway does the intellectual pose of "well, I could make regular great movies if I wanted to, but I choose not to". Bullshit. I challenge Greenaway's fans to cite one scene - one - of his that can match the Travis Bickle "you talking to me?" scene in Taxi Driver. Just a stationary camera and a guy talking to himself in the mirror made one of the most riveting movie moments of all time. For all his wannabe intellectualism and art-house wank, Greenaway can only dream of movie-making of that calibre. Greenaway is no more an artist than Zsa Zsa Gabor. He and his tiresome supporters suffer from archetypal wank-art disease: that something has artistic merit purely by virtue of being different, or shocking, or disgusting. Why are Greenaway's movies any more artistic than a performance artist shitting on stage and eating it, or a comedian walking offstage and kicking an audience member in the balls? He has no narrative skills, no ability to make us feel for a character, no ability to make us feel excitement, or laughter. These things require a skilled director. Showing an endless sequence of pretty pictures and letting us know how many obscure books you've read doesn't count. This
isn't art, it's masturbation.
9 December 2004 Quote of the day
-
Jack McCoy, Law & Order
I'll
never look at Peter Costello the
same way again.
Why I am not a Christian: exhibit A Some days back I posted about a wannabe-Jesus-sequel by the name of Jacob Jones, who was writing post after post at the libertarian.org.au forum trying in an effort to make us see the light and save our souls from hell. It seems Jacob has finally lost patience with us, and feels frustrated that nobody is taking him seriously. Jacob has bid us farewell with an angry post threatening us all with a divine reckoning....
Good to see Jacob is a modest fella. "God's messenger" eh? I'm curious: what do people like Jacob actually discuss with God during their conversations? Football? Theology? Cheese?
(What work? Making Christians look like raving idiots?)
Ooooh, scary! Jacob, like a lot of religious people, doesn't seem to understand that threatening non-believers with divine retribution isn't particularly effective.
On the subject of "delusions", here are some of Jacob's previous utterances:
Anyway,
the the conclusion of Jacob's farewell post:
Charming
fellow. "God loves you so much he'll send you to hell if you don't
love him back". Kinda sounds more like a child-molester than a benevolent
deity.
7 December 2004 I guess the brainectomy was cancelled Joe Vialls is back! Woo! He brings us two pieces of important news..... - the fearsome Iraqi resistance has the Americans surrounded and are beginning to "starve them out". I guess our Jew-controlled media is the reason nobody else has heard about this.
Oooooh. Scary. - Joe's absence was caused by a "deadly mystery virus" (known to regular people as "the flu"):
I
can't wait. What's the likelihood Joe will blame his flu on Zionist Death
Gas?
Ahhh, if only..................... People often talk about what they'd buy if they become obscenely rich. Usually, it's boring shit like cars, jewels, clothes, personal trainer, blah blah.... Personally, one of the first things I'd get would be my own Jetcopter. There's something cool about a fast helicopter. I hate planes. A chopper is like a car for the air. Yes, this Sikorsky S-76 would do nicely thank you.
The Deluxe Executive version is a mere USD $8mil. There's also the supremely tasty Bell 430.....
Yes.
This will also do nicely......
Niall is complaining about petrol prices...
I guess the fact that half of the price of a litre on petrol goes straight into the government's pockets is irrelevant. After all, Niall thinks the government taking our money is "part of our citizenship of Australia". So, the government robbing us for a service they do not provide is A-OK, but a company charging money for the sale of their own property is an "abuse of market power". Ya
gotta love lefty logic.
Arguing with another Castro-lover I present for your enjoyment one 'Gregory Shearman', a resident of aus.politics. Gregory thinks Australia has no more freedom than Cuba. No really. Here is a collection of Greggy's posts on Castro, and a few other things. When asked why Cuba doesn't have free elections, Greg says "neither do we". When asked why political opponents of Castro are imprisoned, he says "the same thing happens here". When asked why Cubans don't have freedom of speech, Greg says "neither do we". Greg's reasoning is that Australians are forbidden from joining "political parties" like Al-Quaeda, so we therefore have no freedom of speech or free elections. Ugggh.
Damian gives us a good link and some comments on "alternative" medical quackery. Personally,
I think these practicioners should be clubbed over the head. That is,
after we shoot the faith healers.....
Richard Neville reckons the US military are like the Khans of Mongolia. He supplies lots of evidence, like the bogus "100,000 casualties" from the Lancet, and the "half a million Iraqi children under the age of 5" who were killed by sanctions.
Comparing the Americans to 'Moguls'? Anyhoot, the reason for all this American nastiness is because Americans were brainwashed by the American Music Awards.
I don't think even Richard understands what he's raving about anymore. Meanwhile, over at his blog, Dick is cranky to discover that not everyone agrees with him.
Seems Richard's love of dissenting opinions is confined to those he agrees with. Richard,
you're awfully old to be writing like a teenager. How about retiring while
you still have some illusions to dignity? Looking for older whackings? Wanna see my previous rants against lefty, commie, peacenick wankers, plus lots of fun stuff about motorcycles, music and movies?................ Click here for the full past whackings index |
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Sadly,
the bike ceased production during 2003. This didn't come as a surprise.
The bike had received not one single update since its release in 1996,
and - on paper at least - was falling miles behind the other superbike
competitors. I guess the bosses at the Big K decided they were losing
face by continuing to manufacture the machine. 
In
World Superbike guise, the ZX7 won a mere seven races between 1996 and
2002, and in street form was a whopping 40kgs+ heavier than the GSXR750
or Yamaha's exotic R7.
I
always loved the look of the machine: the "alien" front end
with the wide, twin ram-air scoops gave a rare distinctive character for
a Japanese sports machine.
Greenaway
is, quite simply, one of the the world's worst filmmakers, a cinematic
equivalent of Jean Baudrillard: a man who's shallow pseudo-intellectual
works people pretend to understand and enjoy in order to prove how clever
they are.
