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These don't suck
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Live Whacking Archive
click "Live Whacking" button for the latest entries



Well, after a two week wait, the proper whackingday.com URL is registered and working. If you're linking to this site with the direct IP address, you can now use the "real" URL. Cheers bwanas......

The Ultimate Toy

Check this out. I want one on my dirtbike....

Continental Europe - A review

An American chum of mine - The Great Cantinera - is on a stop-start-stop-start tour through the grand wilds of Europa right now and offers the following report:

"Fuck Europe! The music sucks, the food sucks!!"

She is, at the moment, sequestered away outside London, a city & country she deems far more worthy of her time.

Yanagawa on the ZX-RR MotoGP bike

Kawasaki's Badass Mutha?

After farting around in World Superbikes for a decade with an underfunded team, outdated bike, B-grade riders and stupid rules which favoured V-twins, Kawasaki have wisely packed up their WSBK aspirations and are developing their MotoGP bike for next year.

It's an in-line 4-cylinder fuel-injected machine. Lets hope Kwak don't dick around and actually stick some good riders on it and put some serious resources into developing the thing.

Kawasaki race machines aint ever been short on horsepower, but they've seriously lacked in chassis development and rideability. I hope the rumours of the bike using a souped-up ZX7 frame aint true. If it aint good enough in SBK it's gonna get killed in MotoGP. Yanagawa shouldn't be the rider either. C'Mon Kawasaki, get behind this and stick some bad-ass riders on the thing. My pick would be Andrew Pitt and Hitoyasu Izutsu.

Something's gotta challenge the Hondas next year or it's gonna get very dull. And we don't want a repeat of the SBK Honda/Ducati show.

My name aint Simon

Hehehe. I don't know how this got started. It's kind funny though. Just call me Tex, it's less effort to type.

The Spleen Awakens!

Oregon resident Scott Eiland pens the first entry in the Spleen section with some thoughts on Palestinian democracy. Check it out, or I'll kill your puppies.

We all need one of these

I give you the amazing pussy snorkel. Dont the 21st century kick ass?

More on this dood

Check out this fine essay on my old Khmer-Rouge chum Noam Chomsky.



My e-mail address if you wanna contact me is texacola@hotmail.com

The Brits Grow a Brain

Someone else has finally figured out the stupidities of anti-pot laws.

Pearls of Evil

Got this link from Hot Buttered Death. Whoever designed this game is just asking for a bashing.....



Thanks to the Bitchin' Monaro Guide for this link to a truly disturbing pic.

More Israel

Jason Soon argues that the Israelis are more than capable of their own stupidity in this fine piece.

Bob The Bullshit Artist

In today's Canberra Times, increasingly deranged lefty mumbler Bob Ellis wails against the horrible treatment of Queen Cheryl by those nasty, 'orrible journalists. Bob trots out the typical bilge of the Cheryl sycophant: ie. Cheryl was going to save us from the fascist Howard government, but she got picked on because she was a woman and was destroyed by the Cabal of The Corporate Media, evil right wingers, John Howard, George Bush, the zionists, Batman, oh, and uh.....

Bob reckons Laurie Oakes had no right to release the truth, because he is ugly and fat;

Perhaps Dalley could do a portrait-in-depth of Oakes overweight, shy with women, both admiring and jealous of handsome campus lions such as Evans back when I knew him, in 1960 to 1963.

Wow Bob, that's deep. You ignore Oakes' reasons for releasing the information and instead seek to undermine his reputation by pointing out an awkwardness with the opposite sex. Way to avoid the point. Besides Bob, you're not exactly a stud-muffin yourself.

I've done a lot of agonising before I wrote this. Should I tell what I know of Oakes? Should I ask others what else they know? Should I try to wreck his late middle age and reduce his earnings the way he has Kernot's? I can't really see why not.

Well here's a reason shit-for-brains: maybe because Oakes never ratted on the party which had given her the huge public profile she attained, under the rubric of wanting to save us all from the evil fascism of John Howard. God forbid Oakes should want to point out that this grand act of principle was in fact inspired by some inter-party rumpy-pumpy and Cheryl's massively bloated ego. Maybe because Laurie hasn't been fucking someone else for five years, which - by the way Bob - may have been a contributing factor to the failure of Cheryl's marriage.

Most of all - you stupid, hypocritical bullshit artist - you've already done a first-class hatchet job yourself. Or has your whisky-addled brain made you forget already? Maybe you're angry that Oakes' story was true and in the public interest, while yours was neither? Where are your principles of free speech now, you stupid dumbass?

His view is that sexual acts, when they impact on policy or leadership, are fair game. He will, I presume, now name the closeted homosexuals on the Liberal front benches past and present, and the heterosexual once held for rape, and the prominent journalist who may be a pederast, and the cash journalists have paid for certain kinds of comments, and by whom.

Read the first sentence again: This blabbermouth is actually argues that something which affects the governance of the entire country is not "fair game".

Closeted homosexuals? This would be funny if it were not so abhorrent. Bob compares a persons' private sexual orientation with a grubby political/personal affair which could have influenced political policy outcomes, caused one of Australia's leading politicians and self-appointed moral guardians to lie to parliament. You find that acceptable Bob?

His mention of a pedarast in relation to the Kernot issue shows Ellis' moral depravity. You have this information Bob? Why haven't you told the police? And what the hell does it have to do with a couple of narcissistic politicians fucking each other behind everyone's backs, creating a political alliance out of it, lying about it and getting caught out?

Bob, you're a hypocritical screeching leftist crackpot, and a moral reprobate of the first order. You have shown yourself yet again to be utterly incapable of analysing the issue at hand, but again reduce everything to juvenile paranoid raving about the Grand Guignol of Howard's Australia.

Get a real job, you sorry-ass loser.


Pilger's Jabba strikes again

Phillip Adams has just opened his show announcing he's been at Sydney University today discussing (insert gasps of amazement here) American Imperialism. Is there no end to this man's variety?

Phillip promises to discuss communist terror in North Korea and Cuba next week. BWAHAHAHA...ok, ok, but seriously.....

oh yawwwn: margot Kingston is still yakking about Pauline Hanson, Australian society moving to the far right, yakkety-yakkety-yak. Attention leftist dumbasses, here it is in plain english: Pauline Hanson and One Nation have been voted out. They have ZERO influence on government policy, because they don't fucking exist anymore. GET IT?

Non-vegetarian fashion

Here's what you were looking for: Hats of Meat!

72 Questions for Osama

Get a load of this cheeky bastard. Hehehehehehe


Surprise, Surprise: lies, fucking lies and safety nazis

The most painfully obvious bloody fake photo in Australia, showing a crazy motorcyclist apparently giving the finger to a speed camera whilst going 300% over the speed limit was finally exposed as such on Media Watch. The Victorian cops and the thick-as-pigshit journos at the Herald Sun continue to trot out this bald faced lie, to warn the public of the dangers of evil motorcyclists.

Motorcyclists are always a favourite targets of the traffic nazis. As with all media-whore government jobs, the transport bureaucrats and traffic cops are most probably desperate to be seen to be doing something about road safety. Yeah, we'll crack down on these damned crazy motorcyclists. Never mind that the majority of motorcyclist fatalities are caused by incompetent car drivers. Ah no. Fixing THAT problem (greater levels of training & licencing restrictions on car drivers, enforcement of road rules other than with speed radar and proper fucking penalties for assholes who kill with their cars) is too complicated, too expensive and - most of all - wayyyy too unpopular.

Riders face extensive training procedures and seemingly endless capacity restrictions before they get an open bike licence. What do teenage dickheads in v-8s get? A one-hour test. And how many car drivers are killed by motorcyclists, hmmm? Why are motorcyclists pulled over for doing wheelies while teenage twats who tailgate or stupid bitches who are talking on their mobile phone or applying makeup get away with it? Why don't you crack down on them? Why not crack down on the people who are causing all the fucking fatalities? Why the fuck aren't you actually doing something productive to reduce the road toll instead of spreading forged photos and growing fat behind speed cameras, you stupid lazy dickhead cunts?

Analysis of the fake

It's obvious to any motorcyclist that this photo, apart from being fraudulently rehashed, is in itself, almost certainly complete bullshit: There is no way the rider in this photo was doing 180kph, and the bike was probably at a standstill....

Problem #1: Sitting upright on a motorcycle moving at that speed is damned difficult and seriously uncomfortable, yet this rider - despite being of small stature - has a relaxed posture. His/her body should be resembling the pose of a parachute.

Problem #2: The right hand is not on the throttle, which would make it very difficult to sustain speed. The forks have not compressed, which they bloody would do if engine braking came into effect at 180kph, and the rider damned sure wouldn't have their hand in the air.

Problem #3: This rider was "screaming through busy traffic" were they? Funny, it looks like suburban street to me, being that there's a fucking house fence in the background. Also, if they were surrounded by busy traffic, how were they able to put the bike in neutral, take hand off throttle, get into a perfect upright posture, look toward camera and give the finger sign and still not crash into anything at that extreme speed. Why not just use the non-throttle hand to give the finger and still be in control of the bike's speed and braking?

This photo has all the authenticity of a Taliban press release. And traffic cops and journalists wonder why they have an image problem. Imagine.

Let's Ban Everything

Top-notch short piece from James Morrow about our moral elders trying to ban everything. Are you reading this Peter Batchelor and Mary Delahunty?


Still no domain name. C'Mon!!!!!

Screeching Git takes victory at Wimbledon

Layton Hewitt has won Wimbledon. Was I the only aussie hoping this whinging loudmouth brat would get his arse kicked? Oh wait, looks like Tim Blair was too....


DVD watching & me

I believe movies are meant to be watched in widescreen, in stereo, and on a BIG screen. Back in '98, I invested my hard-earned moolah in a LCD projector, a surround stereo system and a 6-ft wide collapsible screen. At last, I had real movie viewing at home. Best money I ever spent, has brought me many great nights of movie watching.

The latest two I've caught are the DVD releases for oceans 11 and Mulholland Drive. Oceans was as lightweight and forgettable as can be, yet still great fun. Mulholland was the surprise though. For once, David Lynch's weirdness actually worked in his favour. What was it about? Buggered if I know. But it was almost possible to understand what was going on. Turned out to be a spooky and hypnotic effort for the whole stretch, which is more than you could say for Lost Highway or (gulp) Twin Peaks: Fire walk with me.

Oh, and...um...nekkid lesbian love scenes.

Looking for older whackings?

Whackings: 30 June - 4th July: Cheryl Kernot, Phillip Adams, idiot leftist laments lack of artistic dissent, Israel, Mark latham, Valentino Rossi, and more........