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Live Whacking Archive
click "Live Whacking" button for the latest entries

13 November 2003

Quote of the day

"You sold weapons-grade plutonium to the Iraqis - with no markup!!"
- Charles Montgomery Burns

Capitalism and Apples

Sasha Castel has wise words on this subject.

Honestly, I don't know one variety of apple from t'other. I just like the red ones.


Federal Labor goes further down the rabbit hole

The Party of Idiots has elected the appalling Carmen Lawrence as it's national president.

Token Bint promises to make the proletariat do as they are told.

What? Mr Squiggle wasn't available?

Hey OzBloggers...

...would someone in the Uber, Gravett or Drivel empires please offer some server space to Michael Jennings so the rest of us won't be forced to visit blogspot to read his writings?

Come to think of it, could someone give some server space to the ALS to get them off whatever piece-of-shit server they're currently resting on?

Dick - the movie

A couple of weeks ago I caught up with this genuinely funny little comedy. Kirsten Dunst and Michelle Williams play a couple of ditzy teenagers who accidentally trigger the Watergate scandal, and turn out to be the true identity of the infamous Deep Throat.

It's easy to understand why this movie never got a big audience. Most of the potential audience old enough to get most of the watergate jokes would have been put off by the teenage angle to the movie, whereas a lot of the great political humour would simply have flown over the heads of the younger demographic.

It won't change your life, but it's light, clever and fun.

The real reason you must watch this movie however is Dan Hedaya's hysterically funny turn as Richard Nixon. I was practically paralyzed with laughter every time he was onscreen.

Classic moment: Nixon yelling at his dog Checkers: "Shut up you little bastard or I'll feed you to the Chinese".

And I haven't even mentioned the scene where Nixon and Brezhnev get stoned on "herbal" cookies.

Wonderful stuff.

12 November 2003

Lawrence of Arabia

Last night I finally saw the 1962 epic, on a 6-ft screen in widescreen DVD format. I'd seen maybe 30 mins of snippets of this film over the years in crappy pan-n-scan on TV, so it was an experience to witness the real deal.

I'm not a huge fan of "classic" movies, especially "epics". Cecil B. DeMille's films are an excellent cure for insomnia, and Gone With The Wind makes root canal surgery seem like fun, so I wasn't really sure what to expect from Lawrence.

All in all, I was very impressed. Firstly, it's a stunning looking movie, ranking alongside Days of Heaven and The Thin Red Line for achingly beautiful photography. Second, a spare yet clever screenplay without the wooden spoon-fed dialogue of so many movies from that era, and which balanced the geopolitical circumstances with the central narrative. Third, the wonderful cast: Alec Guiness, Anothy Quinn, Omar Sharif, Jack Hawkins, Jose Ferrer and the towering central performance of Peter O'Toole.

The film could have used a better editor (it's around 3h45m in length), but has too many great qualities for any fan of cinema too ignore.

Oh, and the musical score is to die for.

Samizdata praises Holly Valance

Hehehe. God bless Western culture.

The Dinner Party

John "testicles of steel" Hawkins polled a bunch of right-of-centre bloggers, asking who they would invite to a dinner party. These were my picks:

Friedrich Nietzsche
Winston Churchill
Muhammad Ali
Hunter S. Thompson
Umberto Eco
Robert Menzies
PJ O'Rourke
Karl Marx
Fred Dalton Thompson
Gough Whitlam
Daniel Pipes
Carl Sagan
Baruch Spinoza
Sun Tzu

Another completely meaningless space-filling poll

This is floating around the Livejournal community at the moment.

Name: Tex
Owner of:
Two motorcycles, a big-screen projector & surround-sound system, lots of books, tons of magazines, a lot of black clothing, 2 sets of spectacles and a collection of shotglasses.
Love and relationships:
None. But I like to tell people I'm Jewish just to upset the commie scum around the place.
Eat, ride, drink and be merry.
Web junkie. Don't play games much.
Good old $189 Pentax film camera I grabbed in the duty free store minutes before my flight to Japan in '99 was about to leave.
Lotsa things, but don't buy many CDs anymore. 99% of the stuff out there now is garbage.
Star sign:
Who pays any attention to that retarded crap?.
Chinese astrological year:
Ox, according to the google search I just did.
Arts (Honours in Sociology)
Dunno nothing about flowers, but they is pretty.
When I cook, it's usually spaghetti, chili con carne, tacos or corn chip casserole.
Family: 2 brothers, 2 sisters, father

Some good un's.
Childhood pet name:
Lots. Since finding full-time work in '98 I don't read anywhere near as much.
Travel, achieve financial security, play a role in the destruction of leftist thought and islamoscum. Own lots of guns.
Sell-out price:
Depends on context, but I find money eases a lot of shame.
Depends on context.
Not much of it, what remains is kept to a length of a few millimetres.
I can never remember (I don't gaze into my own eyes a lot)
Have a weird, minor allergy to milk chocolate - can sometimes find breathing difficult after eating it.
Quality of life:
Sense of humor:
Odd. The Simpsons and Futurama are funny. Friends is not.
I dunno.
Other languages:
None. Once had a smattering of Indonesian.
Don't get enough of it.
No, I'll take the vodka thanks.
Cleanliness level:
I'm a slob, but a clean slob.
Bury me:
Whatever is cheapest. I mean, what is it with elaborate tombstones and all that crap?
Lifetime achievements:
made a lot of commie scum angry.
Mostly motorbike mags. Finally cancelled my sub to Rolling Stone after realising I couldn't stand it's whiny leftism anymore (the last issue had a feature praising the fearless satire of Ted Rall).
Shut the fuck up and mind your own business you cunt.
How I feel:
What I hear:
Christina Aguilera's Fighter. Hey, I like it. Fuck you.

10 November 2003

Back tomorrow

Too tired. Seeya soon. Go read the Libertarian poll I did for the ALS site.

7 November 2003

I'm outta here

Going to Sydney tomorrow for the big-ass blogger bash.

Back Sunday night. Have fun out there kiddies.

6 November 2003

Get a new server fellas

The Australian Libertarian Society website has been down for around a week now. It came back online for a few hours yesterday, before expiring.

Listen boys, good quality affordable domain hosting is available from lotsa places. How about paying to get the site hosted properly?

Letter-writing idiot at the Sydney Morning Herald

On the same day that millions of dollars are squandered on a horse race, hats and champagne, Australia is hysterical about 14 people arriving in an old boat seeking sanctuary. What a shallow, greedy and ignorant country we have become.

Debby O'Brien, Armidale, November 5.

For the benefit of my overseas readers, the Melbourne Cup horse race started 143 years ago. Oh the horrors of modern Australia.

A site for lovers of meat


Meat is the answer.

Meat is proof God loves us and wants us to be happy.

If God has wanted us to eat vegetables he'd have given them legs to keep 'em out of the dirt!!

And in that spirit, I bring you a website which would cause PETA to have a seizure;

PWEETA - People Who Enjoy Eating Tasty Animals

Bless em. Makes me want to go out and have a medium-rare sirloin right now.

Wog wisdom

The bloody Wog has some fine words on political language.

Read this

Sat hi to right-thinking Kiwi Pete.


There's some seriously confused and weird people doing Google searches. Some have recently found my site by typing in search strings like;

buying a car nude
sluts with snakes
arse-licker picture
bald head pics yasser arafat
banning the snakes
baudrillard death cult
bruce ruxton lefty
beheading pictures
rope ears pakistani woman

4 November 2003

Headline of the day

Man gets arm stuck in train toilet

What is your boozer rating?

Find out at the Drink-O-Meter.

Thanks to Steve in Cali for the link.

France is screwed

Ah, the joys of politically correct government and multiculturalism.

More four-wheel stuff

Gotta say, the new Toyota Rav4 is a front-runner for my spending dollar. The cheapest vehicle available with cruise control and you don't shell out for air con anymore.

I'd be getting the three-door version though.

3 November 2003

Psycho of the day

Our old terrorist-loving friend, Tariq Ali:

Iraqis have one thing of which they can be proud and of which British and US citizens should be envious: an opposition.

Nice bloke.

Life in the Palestinian psycho death cult

Charles Johnson brings us another lovely example of islamic parenting.

Kicking communist filth where it hurts

Say g'day to The Commissar.

Saddamites are back

Be sure to check out the latest publications from the sociopathic freaks at the Green Left Weekly and the ISO.

I'm stunned

Richard Neville (AKA 'IndyMedia made flesh') has written an essay about how much the USA sucks. What were the odds?

It's such an effort of monumental, paranoid lunacy, I couldn't even begin to analyze it. Though this bit in particular was very cute:

Both Australian and America dumped Kyoto, both our current governments are vicious, sadistic, deceitful and pumped up with self-glorification and empire building, edging toward fascism.

"Edging toward fascism". okay. In other news, Richard is appealing to the public have his mescaline stash returned immediately.

2 November 2003

Sunday night

I was planning on having a very lazy weekend, but it's been unexpectedly busy. Lots of socialising with friends and family, plus a bunch of shopping/errands. I'm about to go watch the last MotoGP race of the year, so I'll be back tomorrow.

Before I go, a bit of bike news: I'm pretty sure I'm going to be buying a new motorcycle in the next couple of months, and there's a 95% chance it will be one of the following three "big nakeds", in order of probability:

Kawasaki z1000

Honda CB1300

Triumph Speed Triple

30 October 2003

Bedwetters Inc.

The Webdiary howler-monkeys give us these choice cuts from today's outbreak of leftist panic;

Howard's team mauls our latest outbreak of democracy

The Greens now matter and Howard is out to destroy the latest people's movement

But pride of place must go to a piece of truly crazed gibberish by one Jon Hulme:

We learn nothing from history. A colleague of mine pointed out that the recent visit by Bush had all the hallmarks of Hitler's visit to Paris the day after its Fall on June 23, 1942.

The compliance of Australia is no less than capitulation. John Howard's egotistical attempt to grab the world stage and appease his US taskmasters while placing the country under greater risk of attack frightens the hell out of me. Yet, I find it amusing that the most fearsome, murderous repressive regime is so easily replicated by our so called democracy because of Howard's vanity. Hitler's visit was nothing more than sightseeing of a country under his control. Remove Hitler's name from that last sentence, replace it with Bush and you'll find a striking parallel to today.

The length at which the media was controlled, the people subdued and the leader's protected from all criticism is essentially fascism by any other name.

The Greens were the only voice of dissent heard during this time. For that I thank them, for representing my views and showing extreme courage where others are too cowardly to speak up or gagged by a opportunistic lying fascist with bushy eyebrows (pun intended).

Look out John Howard, because when my kids read the history books in fifty years, I'm sure that's how you'll be remembered.

How blessed we are to have the likes of Mr. Hulme to show us the voice of reason.

....and speaking of assholes......

Peter promoting his latest book, I Wish I Was Osama

Peter Fitzsimons - former Aussie Rugby Union player and terrorist-sympathising surrender-weasel - is back with his "be nice to the poor widdle bombers" riff.

At the very least, at the bare, hungry sniffin' minimum, can we acknowledge that there really is some defence in decency?

I refer to a story written by Herald journalist Tom Allard this month, where he quoted a leading South-East Asian terrorism academic, Dr Rohan Gunaratna, speaking at the National Press Club, saying that though there had been sleeper cells of Jemaah Islamiah in Australia in the late 1990s - including around Dee Why - the problem is they had essentially gone troppo and enjoyed their time here too much to go ahead with the dastardly terrorist plans they were meant to execute.

"Australian ethos had dulled their ideological convictions," Gunaratna said. "They were sympathetic to the cause but didn't want to die for it."

Fitzsimons - a grown man with no drug problem - is arguing not to worry about terrorists, because they'll love our lifestyle so much they'll becoming dinky-di aussies. If you think I'm quoting out of context, read on:

It is not hard to imagine the members of that cell attending their children's school concert and looking around in the crowded hall at all the smiling faces, seeing their kid on stage beaming out at them, and wondering whether it was really a good idea to let off bombs and the like among such a friendly and welcoming people.

And say, Ali, would you like to bring your missus and the kids over to our place on Saturday arvo, before we have a game of beach cricket?

Of course, I am hypothesising. But it's a fair bet that for the terrorist's rage against Australia to dissipate to the point that they did not want to follow orders to unleash hell, they had to be treated with decency and I say "good on yers, and thank you", to those who did.

Can the reality-distortion curve of leftist ideology really be this insane? What does he think the Bali bombers were surrounded by - hook-nose Jews with scimitars disembowelling muslim babies? Why didn't the smiling faces of the Sari Club patrons put these Islamic psychopaths off their happy little misson of mass-murder?

What indecent hell, pray tell, were the comfortable, educated and wealthy sep11 hijackers surrounded by before they carried out their mass-murder? What of the innocent, smiling faces of those on the plane before the knives came out? Should not the hearts of these fine noble terrorists have been melted?

Tempting as it is to join the "let us love our killers" movement, weak souls like myself have this strange idea that Islamonazis can't be negotiated with, and if someone is planning to kill me, I'd rather kill them first.

More evidence of the effectiveness of gun control

A man was shot dead this afternoon at a Sydney service station - a week after the NSW Police set up Task Force Gain to target gun crime and make the streets safe again.

Wasn't making guns illegal supposed to stop people from getting and using them?

Naturally, the opposition spokesman is calling for even tougher gun regulations. It will make illegal weapons, um, more illegal.

Your tax dollars at work folks.

Just what you always wanted

A great resource for bad commie artwork and photographs. Woo!! Get your cop-killer Mumia pics here!! And stinky protestor photos!!

29 October 2003

Can Margot get any more demented?

To all those poor souls who still take Margot Kingston seriously as a political commentator, I present Exhibit A: an entire article dedicated to John Howard sending a letter by regular post rather than express post.

I am not making this up. 389 words dedicated to a letter being posted.

Margot Kingston: fearlessly bringing you the latest Howard attempts at world destruction.

28 October 2003

Two Wheels for 2004

Kevin White has an excellent overview of next year's lineup of two-wheeled machinery.

Good riddance

Überwanker Robert Hughes has given up his Australian citizenship, after apparently not being worshipped enough in his home country.

One wonders why this paragon of windbags campaigned so passionately for the republican cause in a country he hadn't lived in for over thirty years. Well, he's the Amercans' problem now. Lucky them.

Give me wheels or give me death

The Melbourne public have voted with their..umm...feet: Public Transport sucks.

We await some typically idiotic legislation from Peter Batchelor to counter this horrible, horrible freedom.

Quality bloggage

Steve Edwards is on a roll right now, sinking the boot into the Arab media and the sociopathic troll Alison Broinowski.

Pics from Phillip Island

Reader Jake D. sent me a bunch of cool pics he took at the recent MotoGP round at Phillip Island.

(right-to-left) Rossi, Hayden & Melandri at the top of the main straight during the race.
Stunt rider burnout at Lukey Heights
Rossi's race-winning Honda RC211V
Barry Sheene's vintage Manx Norton


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