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21 July 2007 Terje Petersen, commenting on Kevin Rudd's cretinous plan to "investigate" grocery prices:
A pity some people never learn. On usenet last week, some idiot actually said that Woolworths should be "investigated" for "anti-competitive behaviour" because Woollies "doesn't compete with itself". I am not making this up.
I took BMW's f800s out for a test-ride last weekend.
The demo bike I rode was equipped with a BMW top box, heated grips, on-board computer, and ABS. It had only 110kms on the clock, so it really was brand spanking new. The demo bike was for sale at around $19,200 ride-away. The non-abs version (with no add-ons) is $16,290. That's a lot of money for a mere 800cc parallel twin. The astounding part is that it's probably worth it. There are bikes, even a lot of good ones, which are a mere collection of separate components. Then there are bikes where you get the sense that every single component was designed with the other components in mind: a bike which feels integrated. The BMW f800s is one of these bikes. The bike oozes class. The quality of finish is beautiful, as is the single-sided swingarm. Even the seat looks good. The f800s has a finger-twist knob for instant preload adjustment, doing away with the need for a bloody hammer n' screwdriver job on the rear shock. The ride quality was eye-opening. Despite the fairly soft non-adjustable forks, the bike handled as if it was on rails. Not a single instance of bar-twitch or any feeling that I might lose the front. It's a super-stable package that inspires confidence. The brakes are brilliant. I didn't dare test the anti-lock system, but for regular use they have tons of stopping power with a quality level of feedback at the lever. As for the powerplant, a modest 85hp parallel twin may not look much on the spec sheet, but its a beautiful thing on the move. There is instant drive on offer thanks to the linear torque curve and excellent belt-drive system. There's isn't the nasty jerky throttle response you get with the big sports twins. Unlike the Buell XB9R and Ducati Monster 1000, there isn't a sudden drop-off in acceleration once you hit 5000 revs. There's usable drive almost up to the redline. In fact, the engine puts the Buell and Ducati to shame, especially when you consider it's 85cc smaller than the Buell and 200cc smaller than the Duke! Having said that, this bike isn't going to win a drag race against a Hayabusa. Acceleration is crisp and smooth, but you won't get the neck-snapping burst of speed present on more serious sports tackle. But that's not what this bike is about. It's a perfect engine for gliding through a series of curves, rolling on and off the throttle. As for other areas of the bike, it's a mixed bag. The grips have little cushioning and will make your hands numb after a while. This can be easily fixed by some cheap tennis-racquet grip-tape from a sports store, but it's a pity BMW couldn't have provided something as simple as decent grips. As far as the heating of the grips goes: yowza. You could cook eggs on these bloody things. I had to turn them on to the 'low' setting, as even through my winter gloves they were uncomfortably hot. It wasn't a particularly cold day however, so they'd be bloody brilliant on bitter winter mornings. Now for a negative: the switchgear is simply idiotic. Rather than the simple one-button system used by other manufacturers, BMW, for reasons known only to themselves, use three fucking buttons: one on each side, plus a third button on the right to deactivate. It's bloody stupid, pointless, uncomfortable and distracting. The 'on-board computer' is excellent, with tripmeter, temp, fuel guage and a 'distance till empty' indicator. Unfortunately, you have to pay extra to get this 'computer'. How ridiculous. No wonder people make the joke of BMW standing for "bring more wallet". The speedo and tacho are the old analogue style, though the numbers on the speedo are too small. The seat seems comfy, though it'd take a good day-ride to properly determine comfort levels. Being a Beemer, there are a ton of (expensive) factory accessories: the heated grips, top box and ABS system as mentioned above, plus hard panniers, rear seat cowl, higher screen, alarm system, 12v socket, tank bag, GPS, centrestand and seat bag. Surprisingly, there's no factory race pipe, though there's plenty of third-party exhausts out there, which would make the twin sound truly wicked. The f800s is a class act. Great looking, beautifully built, with a quick-steering and stable chassis mated with that superb engine. This is a great bike, and might bring BMW a bunch of customers who have never been interested in the German marque. Here's a youtube video of this bike in its natural environment.
Windowlicker and Wynona's big brown beaver. Brilliant :)
If you must make a defence of the absurd imperial measuring system, this is the way to do it.
I've worked it out: the monstrous mallard is a plot by Adbusters!
I get the horrible feeling that this isn't entirely fictional.
One day, I'm going to buy myself a trike, for two-up touring and really long day-rides (like my twice-yearly trek to Phillip Island). I've previously mentioned the Spyder and T-Rex, with two wheels front, one rear. But the trikes I'm talking about are a different type: specially designed rear-engined vehicles with two wheels at the back, one in front. Like this one:
There are three companies in Australia which make this kind of trike: OzTrikes (pictured), Panther Trikes and Scorpion Trikes. All share roughly the same basic body shapes and features: - standard engines are VW air-cooled units, ranging from 1600-1900cc (some new, some 2nd-hand), except Scorpion trikes which uses 2nd-hand Suzuki Swift engines. All of these are quite low on horsepower, so top speeds for the standard engines peak between 130-160kph depending on engine, but there's enough torque for passenger and a teardrop camper. - motorcycle hand-throttle, but foot actuated clutch and brake pedals. Gearshift levers are usually on the left-hand side below the seat. The scorpion trike has a large "suicide" lever next to the fuel tank - generally 3-4 speed gearbox, plus reverse. - custom-built to order, so you can get gruntier engines (used Subaru engines are popular, as are S&S and Harley engines), different colours, topboxes, bigger fuel tanks, windscreens, chrome gear, crashbars....the list is long. The thing to remember is that these things are comfy cruisers: the wind-in-your face feeling of a motorbike, but with the safety of total stability, and the ability to take a huge amount of luggage and/or a trailer. These aren't supposed to be sportsbikes with an extra wheel, or sports cars with one missing. A passenger is much more comfortable than on a bike, thanks to a "proper" seat, and a fantastic high-up viewing position. That said however, even the lower-power trikes are very fast around corners, thanks to their light weight (around 450kgs) and super-traction. They're pretty pricey, starting around the $30k level with no options. Still, considering the fun factor and the feeling of having your own custom, hand-built vehicle, it's good value IMHO.
Further to my previous post:
Woops. What a shame Joe Vialls isn't alive to experience this.... ...and while I'm bashng Euro-supremacy, it seems the European GPS system which was supposed to render the American system obsolete is having a little difficulty of its own:
Woops. (Thanks to reader David for the link, and Scott Wickstein for the Airbus link.)
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