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Whacking Permalink Archive 21 April 2005 Joe Vialls has been off his game of late, but he's back with a gem containing his patended everything-is-connected-to-Jews ravings. To save you reading it, here's a summary: 1: The Australian government planted drugs on Schapelle Corby. 2: They did this to distract media attention away from sending 500 troops to Iraq to protect filthy slanty-eyed Japanese. 3: They are sending the troops to Iraq on the orders of "Jews in New York" (quite why the Jews are interested in protecting the Japanese is a mystery) 4: More predictions of doom for the Zionist criminals in Israel:
5: The USA is going to invade Palestine, on the "orders" of the Zionist World Government. 6: The Jews and Americans are going to be taught a lesson by the fearsome Arab military forces in the region, who have apprently been armed with space-age Russian death-weapons. They can utterly destroy the USA and Jew armies any time they choose. Mind
you, Joe's not had much luck with previous
predictions....................
"Materialists are a threat to national security" Yep, Joe Vialls isn't the only crackpot I enjoy reading: there's a chap who rivals Joe for sheer derangement: Australian ex-lawyer and "psychic energy" proponent Victor Zammit.
Victor's on a private crusade to prove with indisputable scientific objective evidence that there is such a thing as an afterlife. Thing is though, Victor doesn't have a private, comfortable faith in the afterlife, he demands that everyone accepts his 'evidence', and becomes enraged my "materialists" who fail to recognize the indisputable proof that the universe is powered by "vibrating psychic energy". It's a peculiar mixture of new-age spiritualism, Uri Geller-ist paranormalism, and a serious insecurity complex about scientists. Skeptics aren't just immoral you see: they're dangerous because they won't use psychic energy techniques to combat terrorists. No really. The theory goes something like this: 1: All matter and energy in the world is "vibrating energy". Victor assures us that all secular scientists are in complete agreement about this. 2: The mind is an 'energy station' which creates transmits and receives 'energy'. The will (of the mind) can change the form of this 'energy'. 3: All living humans have a body made up of vibrationary energy which is a duplicate of the physical body and will survive physical death and retain consciousness.
Yeah, it's perfectly self-evident isn't it, you secular fools. 4: The afterlife has different levels of this 'energy' which form different spheres 'according to the speed of vibration': The faster the vibrations of a sphere the higher and more spiritually evolved are the entities which reside there. Hey, this is getting exciting! 5: The more spiritually evolved a being is, the brighter the energy of the aura. Vic doesn't explain what the "aura" is, though I suspect being "spiritually evolved" has something to do with giving money to Uri Geller. 6: Slowing down the speed of the 'atomic vortices' [wha?] of the energy will result in 'materialisatio'n. Speeding up the vortices will result in de-materialisation. OK, I gotta confess I got kinda lost here. Thankfully, there's only one bit to go: 7: for every (energy) action there is a (an energy) reaction ie, energy is a 'boomerang' - the 'energy' you give out will inevitably return to you. OK, you got all that? Well, me neither, but it makes perfect sense to Victor, as it apparently forms a group of self-evident irrefutable truths. What's all this got to do with national security? Vic explains: Terrorist do nasty things because there are "powerful negative afterlife entities" that "attach" themselves to the terrorists.
You heard it here first folks. our investigative innovator continues:
You see, Vic says traditional interrogation techniques would fail to extract the necessary information from the terrrorist, which will result in tragic consequences. To prevent this, we must use psychic techniques:
Here's the good enws:
Yay. All Prez Bush needs to do is hire himself some psychics and terrorism will be stopped cold, 'coz the attached entity could not resist the urge to spill the beans about their plans. So it's clear you see: skeptics are hindering our fight against terrorism.
Well,
now we know. Can we act on this before Osama nukes us?
If I was a billionaire, part III I'd buy a huge rural property, and build myself a replica of Phillip Island raceway:
The greatest racetrack on earth, by light-years, even though new owner Lindsay Fox has done a good job of trying to fuck it up recently (huge ugly gravel traps, a view-restricting new pit wall) and there's the horrible threat of it becoming an F1 track. If there's one thing F1 does brlliantly, its fuck up great racetracks (Monza, Hockenheim, Kyalami to name but a few). Man,
if I owned this place, I doubt I'd ever leave.
Suggestions to business owners & managers - If you don't like to be contacted by e-mail, don't fucking advertise your e-mail address on your "contact us" page or in your yellow pages ad. - If you ever want my business, never, ever do cold-calling or door-to-door marketing. - I don't care if my offer is too low for you. Either accept it, or don't. My only obligation is to maximise my own spending dollar. Don't whine about how you're not making money on the deal. That's your problem. - If you're bidding for a tender, it is up to you to get my business. I'm not going to make any effort to help you figure out how to get the bid. Read the goddamned tender document and offer a good price. When you submit your bid, keep it as short as possible, and don't include 30 pages showing us your company profile. - If you have a catalogue on your website, give specifications and prices where possible. If I wanted to "ring for more information", I would have rung you in the first place. - Motorcycle dealers: if you want to sell me your shiny new bike, have a demo model available for me to test ride. I don't care if this costs you money. If I don't get to ride it, I don't buy it. Suzuki and Yamaha, I'm talking to you. - Cinema owners: let people bring in their own damn food and drinks. I haven't been to the movies in two years. My home theatre setup means not having to pay ridiculous ticket prices, and be forced to eat $10 popcorn and $5 cokes. If you guys wanna survive for much longer, you're going to have to sharpen up your act. -
Retail outlets: keep a good amount of stock on hand, because I'm never
going to ask you to "order it in" for me.
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