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23-12-02

Idiot of the day

Blockhead Brian Reade at The Osama Daily has this hysterical screed;

Why can't Tony Blair do a Liz Hurley? (He's already got the false accent, the phoney acting skills and a partner who was caught with their pants down). Why can't he turn round to Bush and say, "The screwing is over. I'm not some lonely, frightened, little lapdog, dependent on your economic power. My country can not only cope much better on its own, but it would feel a lot cleaner for doing so, and win a lot more respect.

Yes you limeys, overthrow your american imperalist shackles and gain the respect of the French and Arab dictators.

Sheesh.... grown, educated men with an inferiority complex about Americans. Is there anything more pathetic?
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Oh wait...here's another one

The Osama Daily's other resident cerebral embolism is Paul Routledge, who advocates fearless rebellion against the evil USA;

UNITED AGAINST STATES

Bad grammar, and you call Dubya stupid. OK, so you're apparently "against states", which is puzzling seeing as Old Blighty doesn't have any.

AS citizens, we have little power to prevent our leaders going to war against Iraq.

We only have the vote, and that only once every four or five years. And the politicians know that most elections are about the economy, not their idiotic foreign adventures.

I've said it before, I'll say it again: the left really don't like the majority exercising their democratic choices do they? I guess it gets in the way of correct ideology.

But we are also consumers, and in the run-up to war a Boycott America campaign has been suggested. These principles could provide some guidance:

(One can hear Alan Greenspan pissing his trousers already)

- DO not go to the United States as a tourist. Stay at home and see what a much finer country ours is.

Bad food, urban decay, overpriced everything, and english weather!! Woooo!

- DO not buy or drink American wine, beer or spirits. Give me Tetley's any day.

Avoid American beer? Good idea. Problem is he's advocating drinking the english stuff: flat, warm and as tasty as a Soho hooker.

- DO not eat American food. Stay away from McDonald's and all the other fast-food outlets.

Yes, though you'll have to eat english food instead, which for most people on earth is an attractive a proposition as Turkish jail rations.

- DO not pay to watch American films. They are full of noise, foul language and violence.

Good advice. Stick to intellectual British fare like Trainspotting, Snatch, Lock Stock and 2 Smoking barrels and The Long Good Friday.

- DO not buy American newspapers or magazines.

The downturn in The New York Times' english readership will really kick 'em in the balls.

- DO not use Americanisms. Instead of "Hi!" let's go back to saying "Good morning." No more "Yeah!" A "yes" will suffice.

Ooooh, yeah.... way to sock it to Rumsfeld!!

- DO not wear American clothes. Throw the baseball cap in the dustbin (not, emphatically not, the trash can).

Man, where was this guy when Lenin needed him? What is this...Revolution for Dorks 101?

- DO not fly American airlines anywhere. It's probably safer not to.

Yeah, use Aeroflot: "If we're late it's because we're dead!"

- DO not smoke American cigarettes. They are bigger killers than al-Qaeda.

Non-american cigarettes are of course completely safe.

- DO not, above all, believe the lies that will spew out of the Anglo-American spin machine once the conflict gets under way.

Care to name any specifics, fatso?

- IF we try to live by these simple precepts, perhaps one day the United States will be forced to mend its violent, imperial ways.

Oh yeah man, they're shaking in terror at your fat-middle-class-twat non-rebellion. You can do nothing except mouth off juvenile anti-american slogans, adopting the typical lazy intellectual posturing of the leftist gasbag.

Not only don't you have the intellectual capacity to detail your EUnuch bluster, you don't even have the balls to propose real actions to back them up.

Go home and play with your trains, loser.
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