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10 November 2005

In the mouth of madness

I've been setting up my new PC & associated bits n' pieces for the last few nights, hence the lack of Thom updates. Let me fix that right now.....

I've been monitoring The Green Headcase for the last few days, and it's becoming ever more clear what a frothing, psychotic nutball he really is.

Conversations with Thom consist of five stages, all of which can run concurrently:

1- A complete inability to follow - or even understand - the subject at hand.

2- Similarly, Thom's utterances are for a large part a sequence of non-sequiturs.

3- An amazing inability to keep track of his own lies.

4- Lots of empty threats, which he quickly forgets about once his bluff is called.

5- Thom will repeat the same question, over and over, no matter how many times you answer it. He'll also repeat the same disproven factoids ad infinitum.

OK, so let's catch up with Thom's recent mutterings...

First of all, remember Thom's threats that his lawyers would take my house and close down my website? I asked him why I hadn't heard from these scary fellows.

At first, Thom stalled by saying they "didn't know" who the website host was. After supplying him with the name & contact details for my webhost on three occasions, Thom responded:

since your a liar we don't believe you.

I guess looking at the webpage with their contact details was a little difficult for him and his lawyers. I had to send him the contact details & URL again.

Thom moved on to a new stalling tactic: I had to post my full name & address on the public forum, so his lawyers could "serve" me. No said I, but I would happily supply it to his "lawyers" if they e-mailed me. A simple request, but one which made Thom scream about my "cowardice":

E-mail is not legally binding dung for brains and you know it.  Your
hiding behind the net, your a coward.

I pointed out to our mentally-deficient Green friend that merely requesting someone's contact details didn't require a "legally binding" document.

After days and days of repeating this offer, Thom suddenly changed his tune:

Why would the American end of things want to deal with you here?  Thats my job, they are just looking at removing your lieing blog.  Send me your address liar.

Heh. So, Thom has magical lawyers who will have no contact whatsoever with the person they are taking action against, but instead will operate through Thom. That part makes the whole thing sound really believable to me.

I concluded that the reason Thom wants my street address is for his Australian-based lawyers, right? Turns out, Poor Thom admitted he doesn't have any Australian-based lawyers:

Me: But you don't *have* a lawyer do you?
Thom: Not in Australia YET

Snerk. Some great legal might Thom is going to hammer me with: first, a non-existent Australian lawyer, and second, an American law firm who cannot be found in any American telephone directory or Bar Association lists, who apparently need to conduct all their court action through their client, and who have been unable to contact my web hosts despite having access to their phone number, address and e-mail.

Hmmm. I'm guessing I'm not about to lose my house any time soon.

Having dispensed with Thom's lame legal threats, how about his promises to close down my Gmail account?

He'se hiding behind GMAIL for
starters and violating their policies left and right so he won't be
with them for much longer.

[...]

GMAIL says they are reviewing everything you have sent.  Its up to
them now.  By the way GMAIL keeps EVERYTHING .

I informed poor Thommy a few days later that my account was still active, and reminded of his promise to have it closed. He responded:

Yup, see unlike you who has no life other than to be an internet
asshole I have a life and things to do.  Post your address you lieing
coward.

I'm guessing the "things to do" includes sending dozens of incoherent rants to USENET forums.

I was curious though: if his American 'lawyers' didn't want my address, and he doesn't even have an Australian lawyer, why exactly did he need my street address? Seems he wants a little man-on-man action:

Me: There's a very easy way foryou to discover my address: have your lawyer e-mail me and I'll send it to him. That way, he can send me your registered letter.

Thom: I have an easier one, post it NOW!  Why go through expensive lawyers
when we can settle it man to man or whatever it is in your case.

So, Thom doesn't want lawyers involved after all, he wants to settle it "man to man", whatever that means. I suspect there's an implied threat in there.

Well, now that Thom's badass lawyers have been flushed down the proverbial toilet, and my gmail account is no longer a concern of his, what about his "friend" in the "Federal Police"? You remember, this one:

I also had a talk with a friend in the Federal Police who informed me that based on what I showed him the guy is a stalking under Australian law.

I mentioned that I know quite a few people in the Federal Police, and asked for more details. Thom didn't respond to my questions...

...until days later when I mentioned it again, and got a very different story:

What police friend is that.  Making things up again or too stoned to
understand whats being said.

If you're going to lie, at least make an effort to remember the shit you made up.

No word from Thom's mystery photographer friend either. The one who Thom claimed wanted "$5000 immediately"....a figure which a few days later had turned into a mere "$175". Surprisingly (not really), Thom could not provide a name or contact details for this person.

So here we are, a week later. How have Thom's scary threats worked out?

- Website not closed down, as threatened.
- Gmail account not closed down, as threatened.
- Thom's American "law firm" cannot be found in any telephone or legal directory, and apparently are incapable of using e-mail, telephones and the Internet.
- Thom admitted he has no Australian lawyer.
- No legal action of any kind undertaken against me.
- Thom can't seem to remember if he has a special police "friend" who's going to arrest me.
- No further details on the mystery "communication tribunal" who were going to punish me. A request to Thom for their contact details met with no response.
- Thom wants my full name and street address, even though he admitted having no lawyer, because he wants to settle things "man to man".

Hmmmm, an implied threat of physical violence, along with demands for payment to a 'friend' Thom can't identify. Looks a little like criminal conduct doesn't it?

Personally, I'm really really hoping Thom decides to run for office again.....


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