| 22 March 2006
Crotch Man - the secret revealed
So, did you guess what product Crotch-Man was attached to?
It was - bewilderingly - a bath towel.
So, why exactly is Crotch-Man holding his privates?
- does he need to pee and can't find a toilet? Needs something to soak up the mess?
- does he have a terrible genital infection he needs to apply a hot compress to?
- does he have an abnormally large cock and needs to hide an erection?
- does he have an abnormally small cock and needs to hide his shame?
- Is it John Bobbit looking for an improvised bandage of some sort?
- did someone just knee him in the balls and the towel-maker thought it was funny?
- the four darts you can see above his head are headed for his family jewels?
Ah, the mysteries of the universe.
All the problems of the world are solved
An Australian company is releasing a Free Energy machine.
The Lutec 1000 is the first free energy machine to be developed to commercial stage anywhere in the world.
The Lutec 1000 generator will produce up to 1000 watts of DC electricity twenty four hours a day, every day, which will be stored in a battery bank and then inverted to AC power and connected directly into the home or business.
The Lutec 1000 draws the power it requires to run itself from the same battery bank.
No, really. People on USENET are very excited about it, so it must work.
Ah well, that explains it then.......
An insane muslim poster on USENET, operating under the handle 'Kangarooistan', explains the real reason why the nice Taliban guys were forced to destroy the evil giant Buddha statue:
THE REPORTS I READ AT THE TIME PUT OUT BY THE TALIBAN SAID THEY
DESTROYED THE STATUES BECAUSE A AUSRTRALIAN JOURNALIST HAD SOUGHT AND RECIEVED PERMISSION TO TRAVEL TO BUT NOT FILM THE STATUES OR ANYTHING IN AFGHANISTAN JUST PRIOR TO THE INVASION
THE JOURNALIST PROMISED AND BROKE THE PROMISE
THE TALIBAN TOOK THIS TO BE AN UNDERCOVER AGENT SO ORDERED HIM ARRESTED AND THE STATUES DESTROYED
HE GOT AWAY
AND THE STATUES THAT HAD BEEN OK FOR CENTURIES NOW HAD PUT THE SECURITY OF THE COUNTRY IN DANGER AND WERE DESTROYED
TILL THEN THE TALIBAN HAD NOT EVEN THOUGHT IOF DESTROYING THEM
AND HAD PRESERVED OTHER SIMILAR RELIGIOUS ARTIFACTS
SO WHY DID THEY NOT DESTROY THE OTHERS???
THE WESTERN MEDIA JUST SAID IT WAS BECAUSE THEY WERE RELIGIOUS NUTTERS
IT WAS NOT BECAUSE OF RELIGION OR THEY WOULD HAVE ATTACKED THE OTHERS TOO
IT IS A LONG STANDING METHOD OF SENDING UNDERCOVER AGENTS BEHIND ENEMY
LINES TO INSPECT OLD BUILDINGS AND HISTORICAL SITES
BEEN DONE FOR CENTURIES
DID YOU SEE WESTERN SOLDIERS IN WW1 UES THE SPHINX IN EGYPT AS TARGET
PRACTICE FOR FIELD CANNONS
ITS ON FILM BUT NOT SHOWN OFTEN
Um, OK then.
More on the bad dentist
It's 9 days since my tooth got "fixed", and the fucking thing is hurting again.
Useless incompetent cunt dentist.
Pizza
Meh, no time for me to do another pizza update tonight. Hopefully in my next update....
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